FUTURE SHOCK THERAPY: Episode 12.1 Recap

OH MY GOD.... GET OVER HERE YOU DONKEY!   LOOK AT THESE ROOKIES!  THEY'RE RAW!   

Hey, did you guys know Future Shock Season 12 started last night? 

I'm just wondering, because I'm not confident that all participants were aware of that.  

Seriously, with first impressions and immunity on the line, I was stunned by how flat some of the girls came into this match.  A couple seemed flat out unprepared. I have never been this underwhelmed after a Future Shock premiere.

Any title shot in FFW is earned through blood and sweat, and the opportunity to walk into this company with one is something NO ONE should ever sniff at.  Failing that, at least make yourself stand out positively and look like you can make an impact in this company.  Otherwise... if you get accepted at all you could be looking at a lot of downtime.  

Seriously.  Any of you really want to become the next Hanna Elliot? 

Luckily, most of these women are going to get the opportunity to make a second impression.  Lilly Sheffield's through on immunity, and one other would be an absolute travesty if she's eliminated at this point.  Two others certainly did enough to deserve a second look, and the last two... well... that's up to you fans... and just remember that you're voting for the woman you want GONE this season. 

And if you think I'm being mean and trollish, think again.  Because I guarantee you most of the fans at home are thinking the exact same goddamn things. 

WAKE UP LADIES. 

Here's your rankings. 

1. LILLY SHEFFIELD: As I predicted, Lilly was the winner, although her overall impression is mitigated slightly by her #5 draw (not that it's her fault).  It's clearly obvious that she's been working with her friends in Sudden IMpact and her brother, and as a result, immunity.  She was the slight favorite going into the season, but she's opened up that gap considerably.  Well... except for...

2. ADIRA RIDDICK: It's a mark of how strong Adira came in this that for a couple seconds, I considered putting HER #1.  Adira was in control for much of the match, and had two eliminations to her name.  As it stands right now, Season 12 is a two horse race, and while Adira needs to work on closing out, she's going to be right there at the end. 

3. RHEA LASKARIS: Rhea lasted just shy of seven minutes in the match- only Adira lasted longer, and did get an elimination.  But she ran out of gas towards the end- it was clear that preliminary draw hurt her.  She should be safe.

4. DJ LAINE: And now here is where we start to scratch our heads.  I'm not knocking Reiha's heart, but when you don't even make it to the next entrant, something clearly went wrong.  Target fixation is a devastating mistake, and DJ was guilty and executed.  Laine completely forgot about Laskaris in that ring, came in TOO hard and burned herself out, and it made her night way too short.  Still, she's likeable enough to probably get a second chance to impress, and I have confidence she'll have a better showing next time. 

5. HOPE OSBORNE: Hope was the first one out, lasting just a little over two minutes.  Wrestling wise, she was fine, giving Rhea a heck of a fight, but once Adira hit the ring, she just couldn't handle two at once.  But Hope did nothing to answer the criticism that she's much more focused on yipping at Freya Kane than she is on her opponents in this season, offering only the barest of knowledge of each when it came time to give her thoughts.  Fans expect more than that, and she's one of two that I think is in trouble for this fan vote. 

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6. ANA BARBOSA- I said before the match that Ana needed to dazzle, and she certainly gave us a jaw dropping performance.  I don't see how you could have any other reaction when someone PHYSICALLY PREVENTS ANOTHER WOMAN FROM GETTING ELIMINATED IN A BATTLE ROYAL.  Awful preparation, awful strategy, awful result.  Combine that with her lasting less time than anyone else, and you have to just shake your head.  Ana better find a way to campaign between here and Friday, because she's clearly on the chopping block.