Once again, its time for wrestling manager and analyst Daniel Pollaski to go over the news, reviews, and previews of Femme Fatale Wrestling! All content is the sole opinion of the author and does not reflect the views of Femme Fatale Wrestling, its wrestlers, or administration. Or Wendy Briese, for that matter, so don’t go jumping her in the hallway if you get butthurt about this. Bitch.
The Power X’s inspirational thought of the week
Good morning. In less than an hour, aircraft from here will join others from around the world. And you will be launching the largest aerial battle in the history of mankind. "Mankind." That word should have new meaning for all of us today. We can't be consumed by our petty differences anymore. We will be united in our common interests. Perhaps it's fate that today is the Fourth of July, and you will once again be fighting for our freedom... Not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution... but from annihilation. We are fighting for our right to live. To exist. And should we win the day, the Fourth of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day the world declared in one voice: "We will not go quietly into the night!" We will not vanish without a fight! We're going to live on! We're going to survive! Today we celebrate our Independence Day!
- President Thomas Whitmore (Bill Pullman) “Independence Day”
Hey kids!
The Power X would like to wish everyone a very happy Fourth of July! And as the day turns to evening, the sun goes down, the tempreatures cool, and the stars emerge along with the anticipation for tonight’s festivity, just remember the most important thing about today.
This is the greatest nation on God’s green Earth, and we have every right to celebrate it by blowing up/setting fire to a small chunk.
Which of course, then comes the greatest of American traditioins- the calling of the insurance company to cover your neighbors shiny yellow 2011 Chevrolet Camaro, whose window you just shot a roman candle ball into. Nothing makes you prouder to be an American than screaming “the deductible is WHAT?” over the phone line at some poor kid in New Delhi who’s pretending his name is David.
Not that I’m speaking from experience or anything.
Of course, for those of you who caught the SVW Climax show may have seen me doin’ a bit of liberatin’ of my own. Reading reports of the show, everyone seems to think that I came out wearing a thong. This would be false. I came out wearing a sumo mawashi, which while every bit of revealing, makes me sound a lot more cultured than someone traipsing down wearin’ a g-string.
Anyways, it was good for a laugh, although I likely won’t be doing that again. Those mawashi’s are friggin hard to put on. Not to mention, it was pretty cold out there in the Key, so the polish sausage took a bit of a turn for the worse. And, of course, two words that will strike fear into anyone’s heart:
Crack. Chafing.
At the risk of going a bit TMI, this is why they invented Vaseline, kids.
With that pleasant thought, we move on to a much more pleasant topic of conversation (although I’m certain most everyone would rather see me fully naked than read another NBA blog), Femme Fatale Wrestling.
*RANKINGS!*
Top five remains the same this week, although from six on down, there’s a hell of a lot of shuffling. Part of that is because last week’s holder of the #6 spot has been dropped from the rankings, along with four more wrestlers. So, regrettably, the Power X parts ways (at least temporarily) with the following people [last ranking in brackets]
- Stacey MacKenzie [6] Stacey’s been rockin’ over in SVW, winning a tag team championship with Tiffany. But in FFW, she hasn’t been in the ring since the PPV, and with no match in the next couple of weeks, Stace takes a breather
- Raven Wicked [13] Raven also hasn’t had a match since Conviction, and it doesn’t look like she’ll be back in the ring again until Unstoppable 2. She’ll return after then, but where she ends up has a lot to do with how she fares against Camilla.
- Starla McCloud [19] I’d still put her a top contender for the television title, but Starla’s pretty much been relegated to riding ‘poor’ Casey Atherton like a horse. With Casey joining FFW’s main roster now, will this mean Starla’s return? Or will Casey shunt her aside?
- Jenna McKinley [33] Future endeavored. And DAMN... I had some good Illuminati jokes too!
- Amber Cross [39] Future endeavored. One appearance in the rankings, and last place. Can’t get much better a career than that. But this means that there’s a new ‘wooden spoon’ in the FFW heirarchy? Won’t spoil it yet (it’s coming in like three paragraphs, so chill!), but I will say, it’s been a long time coming.
With those departures, however, we do see three new arrivals and a return. The return’s nothing to write home about, but all the new arrivals have serious wave-making potential.
Alright, you alien assholes! In the words of my generation... UP YOURS!
COUNT EM DOWN!
#38- DESTINY LOVEHEART [No Change]
It has been a very long time coming, but Destiny has finally fufilled her... destiny, taking up the much coveted spot as the worst wrestler on the FFW roster.
#37- SKYE ESTRADA [No Change]
Years from now, when Hayley Dark’s FFW career is commemorated in some sort of a ceremony, Skye will be the answer to a trivia question- who served as the first victory for Dark in her FFW singles career?
#36- CHARITY DEAS [Returning- last ranked 32nd on May 15th]
After all that begging, Charity finally got to return into the ring, and face a returning Tara Thunder. That didn’t go well. At all.
#35- SYD ASHLEY [-1]
After consulting my notes, I have determined that yes, Syd IS a part of Simply Flawless, and she will be in action this week, losing to a debuting Alyson Summers and Undine.
#34- NINA BATTLEHEART ASTRAL [+2]
So after much soul-searching and pondering, I have determined that yes, Nina looked decent enough in her two losses this past fortnight to determine that she’s better than the aforementioned Ashley. She should be proud.
#33- TRACI LOVEHEART [+2]
Traci Loveheart did what Traci Loveheart does best- run the fuck away from her partners when they get into trouble. Shame there won’t be much running from Jo McFarlane- that girl is too fast!
#32- FAITH [No Change]
Faith is coming off a win at the anniversary show. If she and Syd can manage to upset Alyson and Undine, that’ll be two in a row! She’ll have her very own winning streak! But I hope she’s not getting her hopes up.
#31- MICHELLE TAYLOR [No Change]
It’s a misnomer, but ‘carpe diem’ actually does NOT mean sieze the day. It actually is Latin for ‘worthless wrestler gets her ass kicked in tune-up match for champion.’ The more you know.
#30- JO MCFARLANE [No Change]
Chris Strike, who has absolutely no bias in this matter whatsoever, commented last week that Jo is not someone to be slept on (or, likely, with). I’d agree, but she’s got a lot of work to do. At least with Traci Loveheart around the corner, JoJo will be enjoying her first FFW victory come this time two weeks from now.
#29- LUMINA FERRARI [-2]
Not that I wanna put fear into the heart of the little guida, but you think Lumina sees her face instead of Syd/Nina’s every time Rose Jenkins punches someone? That could be her in four weeks!
#28- BELLADONNA [-2]
Belladonna proves that it’s all a matter of perspective. Some might say she’s taking a break from FFW, but in reality, it’s FFW that’s getting a break from her.
#27- IGNIS [NEW]
Not entirely sure of what to make of Ignis’s win over NBA, and I’m not sure Ignis is either. She really doesn’t seem like the cheating type (especially compared to some of her ‘teammates’, but Christian seemed to have no problem doing in his girlfriend’s opponent. How does Ignis feel about that?
#26- TARA THUNDER [NEW]
Tara delivered a solid win over Charity Deas a couple nights ago, but my votes still out on her. Obviously, management’s isn’t, because her next match has her competing to become the #1 contender to the Evolution Championship at Conviction.
#25- GRETCHEN DONIMARI [No Change]
Interesting couple of weeks for Gretch. She starts off by losing to Shane Sanders in a tough match, only to find her vanquisher taking her under her wing, and helping her train. That paid off some dividends- we saw a new, more focused Gretchen in Pwn3d!’s win over the Lovehearts. But can that translate to the next step? Colleen is a big hurdle- can Gretchen even come close to getting over it?
#24- HAYLEY DARK [No Change]
Well, Hayley *was* supposed to take on Belladonna at Unstoppable, but Belladonna ran away, so now Hayley’s entered into the Pick Your Poison ladder match. We all know who Hayley REALLY wants to beat up- who’s she gonna pick with Trix off the table?
#23- WHITLEY MERCER [+6]
For a girl who’s most notable performance up to that point was a tough loss to Kitty Mac, Whitley surprised me at Breaking Point. Yeah, its only the Lovehearts, but like her cousin, there was a more focused, vicious side of Mercer we hadn’t seen before. Let’s hope Whitley can keep her momentum going into the Pick Your Poison.
#22- SHANE SANDERS [+6]
I’m gonna say this- if SHane looks every bit as good at Unstoppable as she did against Gretchen on Velocity, Rori Snyder is going to be leaving Charlotte in a body bag.
#21- RORI SNYDER [No Change]
Rori hasn’t been in the ring in a while, which is unfortunate. Not because I enjoy watching her wrestle- only a dedicated masochist would do that. But at least when she’s in the ring, trying to figure out how to cheat her way out of the match, she’s not talking.
#20- KASSANDRA [-6]
Definite step back for Kassi this week. First she loses out of the Chase for the Crown, then this mysterious guy comes in and costs her her match against Helmsley. With the Danger Queens’ shots at the Eternal Flame coming up, Kassi better get it into gear.
#19 REBBECCA VALENTINE [+1]
*FFW UNITY TAG TEAM CHAMPION*
Hope Becky had enough time to bask in the glory of her victory over Angelic S&D, because things get difficult from here on. First, it’s newcomer Ignis in a Season 2 vs. Season 3 Future Shock battle, then it’s the Danger Queens at unstoppable. I’m not sold on Valentine as a credible threat yet, so we’ll see how she handles herself.
#18- PAYTON ST. PIERRE [+4]
We’ll bump Payton up a few spots this week- make her challenge to Sophie Richards all that more credible. And it’ll be fun to drop her even further after Sophie destroys her!
#17 AMY [NEW]
Amy was by far the single toughest person to place in here. Her return resulted in a defeat (and a ring bell hammer to the noggin), but when you consider who she lost to, and how hard she fought, it’s tough to get too down on her. So she ends up here, but with the caveat to expect a MASSIVE leap up if Amy tears through the competition in the Elimination Chamber.
#16- ROSE JENKINS [+7]
Considering her opponent quality, maybe I’m overinflating her just a bit, but DAMN is it fun to watch this woman compete. Every time she pops someone in the face, and they drop, it’s a sight to see. NBA was no exception, and it seems Rose’s duties with her are at an end, as it looks like Samantha’s gonna take it from here. If Rose can beat both Moxie and Lumina in a handicapped match- big things are coming her way.
#15- CHARLOTTE GAGE [+3]
Charlotte had the cycle off, but was forced to watch her partner take two difficult losses in the meantime. That second loss should be the most concerning- it’s obvious that whoever that guy was is a huge distraction for Kassandra. Distractions are not a good thing to have when you’re going for the tag titles.
#14- UNDINE [+2]
Rumors of the Aquablonde’s demise have been greatly exaggerated, and Undine is back- with a vengeance! Well, not really, she’s just teaming with the Season 3 winner of Future Shock to destroy Simply Flawless. But here’s the question everyone’s asking- how long until Undine gets her shot at revenge against Tara Thunder?
#13- DELILAH [No Change]
Angelic S&D seem to be taking some time off, which is a shame, because the Tag Division just isnt’ the same without them.
#12- SELINA [-2]
Oh well, even if they drop off the rankings this week, we’ll keep the fires warm for them. Angelic Cindy always has a place in the Power X, as far as this guy is concerned.
#11- KATHERINE STRYFE [-2]
The Power X’s inspirational thought of the week
Good morning. In less than an hour, aircraft from here will join others from around the world. And you will be launching the largest aerial battle in the history of mankind. "Mankind." That word should have new meaning for all of us today. We can't be consumed by our petty differences anymore. We will be united in our common interests. Perhaps it's fate that today is the Fourth of July, and you will once again be fighting for our freedom... Not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution... but from annihilation. We are fighting for our right to live. To exist. And should we win the day, the Fourth of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day the world declared in one voice: "We will not go quietly into the night!" We will not vanish without a fight! We're going to live on! We're going to survive! Today we celebrate our Independence Day!
- President Thomas Whitmore (Bill Pullman) “Independence Day”
Hey kids!
The Power X would like to wish everyone a very happy Fourth of July! And as the day turns to evening, the sun goes down, the tempreatures cool, and the stars emerge along with the anticipation for tonight’s festivity, just remember the most important thing about today.
This is the greatest nation on God’s green Earth, and we have every right to celebrate it by blowing up/setting fire to a small chunk.
Which of course, then comes the greatest of American traditioins- the calling of the insurance company to cover your neighbors shiny yellow 2011 Chevrolet Camaro, whose window you just shot a roman candle ball into. Nothing makes you prouder to be an American than screaming “the deductible is WHAT?” over the phone line at some poor kid in New Delhi who’s pretending his name is David.
Not that I’m speaking from experience or anything.
Of course, for those of you who caught the SVW Climax show may have seen me doin’ a bit of liberatin’ of my own. Reading reports of the show, everyone seems to think that I came out wearing a thong. This would be false. I came out wearing a sumo mawashi, which while every bit of revealing, makes me sound a lot more cultured than someone traipsing down wearin’ a g-string.
Anyways, it was good for a laugh, although I likely won’t be doing that again. Those mawashi’s are friggin hard to put on. Not to mention, it was pretty cold out there in the Key, so the polish sausage took a bit of a turn for the worse. And, of course, two words that will strike fear into anyone’s heart:
Crack. Chafing.
At the risk of going a bit TMI, this is why they invented Vaseline, kids.
With that pleasant thought, we move on to a much more pleasant topic of conversation (although I’m certain most everyone would rather see me fully naked than read another NBA blog), Femme Fatale Wrestling.
*RANKINGS!*
Top five remains the same this week, although from six on down, there’s a hell of a lot of shuffling. Part of that is because last week’s holder of the #6 spot has been dropped from the rankings, along with four more wrestlers. So, regrettably, the Power X parts ways (at least temporarily) with the following people [last ranking in brackets]
- Stacey MacKenzie [6] Stacey’s been rockin’ over in SVW, winning a tag team championship with Tiffany. But in FFW, she hasn’t been in the ring since the PPV, and with no match in the next couple of weeks, Stace takes a breather
- Raven Wicked [13] Raven also hasn’t had a match since Conviction, and it doesn’t look like she’ll be back in the ring again until Unstoppable 2. She’ll return after then, but where she ends up has a lot to do with how she fares against Camilla.
- Starla McCloud [19] I’d still put her a top contender for the television title, but Starla’s pretty much been relegated to riding ‘poor’ Casey Atherton like a horse. With Casey joining FFW’s main roster now, will this mean Starla’s return? Or will Casey shunt her aside?
- Jenna McKinley [33] Future endeavored. And DAMN... I had some good Illuminati jokes too!
- Amber Cross [39] Future endeavored. One appearance in the rankings, and last place. Can’t get much better a career than that. But this means that there’s a new ‘wooden spoon’ in the FFW heirarchy? Won’t spoil it yet (it’s coming in like three paragraphs, so chill!), but I will say, it’s been a long time coming.
With those departures, however, we do see three new arrivals and a return. The return’s nothing to write home about, but all the new arrivals have serious wave-making potential.
Alright, you alien assholes! In the words of my generation... UP YOURS!
COUNT EM DOWN!
#38- DESTINY LOVEHEART [No Change]
It has been a very long time coming, but Destiny has finally fufilled her... destiny, taking up the much coveted spot as the worst wrestler on the FFW roster.
#37- SKYE ESTRADA [No Change]
Years from now, when Hayley Dark’s FFW career is commemorated in some sort of a ceremony, Skye will be the answer to a trivia question- who served as the first victory for Dark in her FFW singles career?
#36- CHARITY DEAS [Returning- last ranked 32nd on May 15th]
After all that begging, Charity finally got to return into the ring, and face a returning Tara Thunder. That didn’t go well. At all.
#35- SYD ASHLEY [-1]
After consulting my notes, I have determined that yes, Syd IS a part of Simply Flawless, and she will be in action this week, losing to a debuting Alyson Summers and Undine.
#34- NINA BATTLEHEART ASTRAL [+2]
So after much soul-searching and pondering, I have determined that yes, Nina looked decent enough in her two losses this past fortnight to determine that she’s better than the aforementioned Ashley. She should be proud.
#33- TRACI LOVEHEART [+2]
Traci Loveheart did what Traci Loveheart does best- run the fuck away from her partners when they get into trouble. Shame there won’t be much running from Jo McFarlane- that girl is too fast!
#32- FAITH [No Change]
Faith is coming off a win at the anniversary show. If she and Syd can manage to upset Alyson and Undine, that’ll be two in a row! She’ll have her very own winning streak! But I hope she’s not getting her hopes up.
#31- MICHELLE TAYLOR [No Change]
It’s a misnomer, but ‘carpe diem’ actually does NOT mean sieze the day. It actually is Latin for ‘worthless wrestler gets her ass kicked in tune-up match for champion.’ The more you know.
#30- JO MCFARLANE [No Change]
Chris Strike, who has absolutely no bias in this matter whatsoever, commented last week that Jo is not someone to be slept on (or, likely, with). I’d agree, but she’s got a lot of work to do. At least with Traci Loveheart around the corner, JoJo will be enjoying her first FFW victory come this time two weeks from now.
#29- LUMINA FERRARI [-2]
Not that I wanna put fear into the heart of the little guida, but you think Lumina sees her face instead of Syd/Nina’s every time Rose Jenkins punches someone? That could be her in four weeks!
#28- BELLADONNA [-2]
Belladonna proves that it’s all a matter of perspective. Some might say she’s taking a break from FFW, but in reality, it’s FFW that’s getting a break from her.
#27- IGNIS [NEW]
Not entirely sure of what to make of Ignis’s win over NBA, and I’m not sure Ignis is either. She really doesn’t seem like the cheating type (especially compared to some of her ‘teammates’, but Christian seemed to have no problem doing in his girlfriend’s opponent. How does Ignis feel about that?
#26- TARA THUNDER [NEW]
Tara delivered a solid win over Charity Deas a couple nights ago, but my votes still out on her. Obviously, management’s isn’t, because her next match has her competing to become the #1 contender to the Evolution Championship at Conviction.
#25- GRETCHEN DONIMARI [No Change]
Interesting couple of weeks for Gretch. She starts off by losing to Shane Sanders in a tough match, only to find her vanquisher taking her under her wing, and helping her train. That paid off some dividends- we saw a new, more focused Gretchen in Pwn3d!’s win over the Lovehearts. But can that translate to the next step? Colleen is a big hurdle- can Gretchen even come close to getting over it?
#24- HAYLEY DARK [No Change]
Well, Hayley *was* supposed to take on Belladonna at Unstoppable, but Belladonna ran away, so now Hayley’s entered into the Pick Your Poison ladder match. We all know who Hayley REALLY wants to beat up- who’s she gonna pick with Trix off the table?
#23- WHITLEY MERCER [+6]
For a girl who’s most notable performance up to that point was a tough loss to Kitty Mac, Whitley surprised me at Breaking Point. Yeah, its only the Lovehearts, but like her cousin, there was a more focused, vicious side of Mercer we hadn’t seen before. Let’s hope Whitley can keep her momentum going into the Pick Your Poison.
#22- SHANE SANDERS [+6]
I’m gonna say this- if SHane looks every bit as good at Unstoppable as she did against Gretchen on Velocity, Rori Snyder is going to be leaving Charlotte in a body bag.
#21- RORI SNYDER [No Change]
Rori hasn’t been in the ring in a while, which is unfortunate. Not because I enjoy watching her wrestle- only a dedicated masochist would do that. But at least when she’s in the ring, trying to figure out how to cheat her way out of the match, she’s not talking.
#20- KASSANDRA [-6]
Definite step back for Kassi this week. First she loses out of the Chase for the Crown, then this mysterious guy comes in and costs her her match against Helmsley. With the Danger Queens’ shots at the Eternal Flame coming up, Kassi better get it into gear.
#19 REBBECCA VALENTINE [+1]
*FFW UNITY TAG TEAM CHAMPION*
Hope Becky had enough time to bask in the glory of her victory over Angelic S&D, because things get difficult from here on. First, it’s newcomer Ignis in a Season 2 vs. Season 3 Future Shock battle, then it’s the Danger Queens at unstoppable. I’m not sold on Valentine as a credible threat yet, so we’ll see how she handles herself.
#18- PAYTON ST. PIERRE [+4]
We’ll bump Payton up a few spots this week- make her challenge to Sophie Richards all that more credible. And it’ll be fun to drop her even further after Sophie destroys her!
#17 AMY [NEW]
Amy was by far the single toughest person to place in here. Her return resulted in a defeat (and a ring bell hammer to the noggin), but when you consider who she lost to, and how hard she fought, it’s tough to get too down on her. So she ends up here, but with the caveat to expect a MASSIVE leap up if Amy tears through the competition in the Elimination Chamber.
#16- ROSE JENKINS [+7]
Considering her opponent quality, maybe I’m overinflating her just a bit, but DAMN is it fun to watch this woman compete. Every time she pops someone in the face, and they drop, it’s a sight to see. NBA was no exception, and it seems Rose’s duties with her are at an end, as it looks like Samantha’s gonna take it from here. If Rose can beat both Moxie and Lumina in a handicapped match- big things are coming her way.
#15- CHARLOTTE GAGE [+3]
Charlotte had the cycle off, but was forced to watch her partner take two difficult losses in the meantime. That second loss should be the most concerning- it’s obvious that whoever that guy was is a huge distraction for Kassandra. Distractions are not a good thing to have when you’re going for the tag titles.
#14- UNDINE [+2]
Rumors of the Aquablonde’s demise have been greatly exaggerated, and Undine is back- with a vengeance! Well, not really, she’s just teaming with the Season 3 winner of Future Shock to destroy Simply Flawless. But here’s the question everyone’s asking- how long until Undine gets her shot at revenge against Tara Thunder?
#13- DELILAH [No Change]
Angelic S&D seem to be taking some time off, which is a shame, because the Tag Division just isnt’ the same without them.
#12- SELINA [-2]
Oh well, even if they drop off the rankings this week, we’ll keep the fires warm for them. Angelic Cindy always has a place in the Power X, as far as this guy is concerned.
#11- KATHERINE STRYFE [-2]
*FFW UNITY TAG TEAM CHAMPION*
Well, what did I tell you? Momentum has absolutely no effect on Stryfe. When it looks like she’s getting hot, she loses. When it looks like she’s jumped the shark, she wins. Which sets up interestingly- Stryfe’s loss to Helmsley was hardly momentum killing, so what happens at Unstoppable? For good or ill, Stryfe will likely manage to go the opposite way of the expected.
#10- WENDY BRIESE [+2]
Wendy’s far from happy about how it went about, but she really has no room to gripe- she’s gotten herself right where she wants to be as the Chase comes to a conclusion. Throw in a match with Kaitlynn Stryfe in a couple of days, and the fact is clear- there is NO ONE with more to gain in FFW over the next two weeks than this woman.
#9- ROBBYN HELMSLEY [+6]
Supergirl’s back in the top 10 after two impressive victories. First she downs Stryfe, and while her victory over Kassandra is less impressive from a strength of opponent standpoint, the fact remains it’s a good way to wipe a blemish from her record- Kassi submitted her just a month ago. So with that hiccup clean, its full speed ahead for Robbyn as she prepares to challenge Colleen again for the Evolution title. Or.. will she? Read on :D
#8- CRYSTAL HILTON [+3]
Hilton emerges from Indianapolis the darling newcomer of FFW, and the way she’s been, it’s tough to argue with that. Still, I think Hilton’s warped sense of reality is eventually going to come back and bite her, and what better time than in two weeks at Breaking Point?
#7- VALERIE BELMONT [+1]
Those who watched Climax last night know that Val had a chance to come away the SVW World Champion, but ultimately came up short against her brother. All’s not lost, though- Val’s right back in the title hunt here in FFW in just four weeks. And wouldn’t that be something, if the McFarlane clan secures a stranglehold of both major wrestling titles in the world today?
#6- SOPHIE RICHARDS [+1]
*FFW TELEVISION CHAMPION*
Before Unstoppable, Payton St. Pierre had irritated Sophie to the point where Sophie was ready to forego the TV title to get at her. Well, now its time for her to put her money where her mouth is- she’s got Payton, there are no rules, and its all or nothing!
#5- COLLEEN [No Change]
*FFW EVOLUTION CHAMPION*
Colleen took time from her busy schedule of being pissed off at the world to show up on Breaking Point, and make sure in no uncertain terms that she feels she has Robbyns number. Wouldn’t be surprised if she shows up after the Chase finale in a couple weeks, as well. In the meantime, Colleen’s likely going to be working harder and harder- she’s got a championship to retain.
#4- KAITLYNN STRYFE [No Change]
Kitty-Mac has been quiet since Conviction, but it’s time for her to make some noise yet again. Her match against Wendy notwithstanding, there are some serious unfriendly faces walkiing into the Chamber against her at Unstoppable- Valerie Belmont chief among those names.
#3- CAMILLA PAZZINI [No Change]
*FFW ULTRAVIOLENCE CHAMPION*
Camilla downed Colleen for a second time, and this time, there’s no controversy. Still, it was a match that definitely favored Chunks, but you gotta tip your hat to ‘Hardcore Hotness’. Now, can she keep that title (and her title) at Unstoppable, with Raven Wicked coming into the Prison of Punishment?
#2- ISABELLA PAZZINI [-1]
Back to #2 for Bella- the #1 thing was a one-time deal to prove a point. Still, the futures looking bright for Pazzini after her win over Amy. How bright? Well, we’ll find out at Unstoppable.
#1- SCARLETT KINCAID [No Change]
*FFW CHAMPION*
Scarlett hops back into the ring to face Michelle Taylor in what should ultimately amount to little more than a warm-up match for Unstoppable. Once she’s ‘carped’ her ‘diem’, the focus returns to defending her title- over five women, no less!
And there we have it!
Of course, comments are welcome below, and people actually deigned to comment this time, so thanks to the two who did! And yours truly received no less than THREE mentions in promos over the past couple of weeks, which means this column is getting read, and getting read hard!
So a big thanks there.
Now, enough mushy bullshit... onto
*FUTURE SHOCK THERAPY!*
Season three is over, and Alyson Summers is the winner, pulling out all the stops (and nearly killing herself) against Kelly Allen to get the win. Not bad, considering that my Season 3 preview tagged her with most annoying, and I figured she’d be gone by the third show. She’s still annoying, but it’s a lot harder to get on that when you have FUTURE SHOCK CHAMPION added to the end of your name.
So congrats, Aly. Look forward to seeing you in the big leagues.
Well, FFW doesn’t like to keep us waiting, and Season 4 is already a go. Six new rookies join the fray, and they had the ‘honor’ of being introduced by our champion. That gets into quotes because if you saw the preview show, you were treated to Scarlett Kincaid putting on the most cheesy, absolute shameless shill job in promotional history. How bad was it? When I watched the show with Wendy, Wendy looked at me and said “What the hell is she doing?”
Congrats Scar, you got Wendy to swear. She will categorically deny this, btw. But it’s true. I’m a witness.
Now, onto the wrestlers themselves, and my first impressions.
THE FAVE: Devin Knight
No, this isn’t me getting a Club CK hard-on. First of all, anything you know about the Knights (aka, the retarded duo of Maddi and Keegan) throw out the fucking window. Devin is much more intelligent than either of her siblings. And she’s an vet, who has a tough as nails attitude. From what I’ve seen- she looks like the early fave.
MEOWZ!: Hanna Elliot
Unforunately, after a bevy of them in Season 3, Season 4 lacks a single redhead, which makes us ginger-lovers sad. So, coming up with the hottest wrestler is a bit tougher this time around, but its hard to overlook the smokin’ Ms. Elliot, who apparently comes from a more- nontraditional sort of wrestling background. Even if she wont’ have a clue what she’s doing, she’ll be fun to watch!
DARK HORSE: Desirae Kain
She’s got the look, she’s got the attitude, and she’s got Simon Sensation in her corner. While I’m not quite picking her over the other DK quite yet... expect Kain to make a hell of a dent.
… REALLY?: Arabella de Rossi
With all due respect to the women currently occupying the 2 and 3 spots in my rankings, I think FFW has just about all it can handle of Italian women with fairly high opinions of themselves. Throwing in the Pazzini’s biggest fan into the mix isn’t exactly my idea of a novel concept. Maybe she’s getting the short end of the stick, but until Arabella does something worth note, my eyes are elsewhere.
VOTES OUT: Gigante
I’m gonna say it- the vast majority of ‘big’ women wrestlers suck. Now, I’m not against a behildabeast squashing the fuck out of some brainless blonde bimbo once in a while, but the fact is, most of the big girls seem to think that just because they’re not the best looking, that automatically makes them a better wrestler. I’ve covered wrestling for ten years, and I can safely say I’ve never seen it done better than Rose Jenkins. Maybe she’s got what it takes, but Gigante has a long way to go to get to that level.
*YAWN*: Alyssa Foxworth
If you follow the FFW and SVW feeds on Twitter (and I don’t blame you if you don’t), you’ve seen Alyssa pop up from time to time to remind us how much better her life is. Yeah, she has money. Yeah, she’s Seth Star’s fiancee. But what Alyssa’s got in money and *ahem* refinement, she so far lacks in anything interesting to bring to the table. THere ain’t enough money in the world to buy her way out of being eliminated on the first vote.
All in all, this doesn’t seem as solid a class as we got in Season 3- which honestly could produce five top-level FFW superstars when all is said and done. Right now, I got two, maybe three girls here who can possibly make it in the big leagues. We’ll see.
*LOOKING AHEAD*
Alright, final cycle of shows before the big dance of Unstoppable, and ten more matches on the table. Top five- countdown!
5. THREE WAY: #23 Whitley Mercer vs. #24 Hayley Dark vs. Mindy Smyth
Eight women are set to compete in the Pick Your Poison ladder match at Unstoppable, and here, three of them throw down. Now, believe it or not, I’ve actually seen newcomer Smyth before, since she was in the small indy women’s fed Missouri Valley Wrestling. There were some talented girls there, but Mindy’s hardly at the top of my list of MVW girls who could make the jump to the big leagues. Mercer’s on an upswing, but the way Hayley Dark is going right now, its tough to pick against her in anything.
WINNER: Dark
4. #5 Colleen vs. #25 Gretchen Donimari
Colleen’s coming off a tough loss to Camilla Pazzini, and she’s gotta be furious. Gretchen’s coming off a win she hopes can turn her career around. Honestly, as much as I love Gretchen, this just seems to big a hill for her to climb at this point in her career. Still, there’s a lot of heart in that young lady, and I’m not about to totally rule out an upset.
WINNER: Colleen
3. #4 Kaitlynn Stryfe vs. #10 Wendy Briese
Wendy’s finally crawled her way into my top 10, and I couldn’t be prouder of her. But THESE are the kind of matches she needs to win if she hopes to get to the next level. Stryfe’s got a feather in her cap from Conviction, but I wouldn’t be a good manager if I didn’t pick my client, right?
WINNER: Briese
2. FFW TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP- NO HOLDS BARRED: #6 Sophi.e Richards © vs. #18 Payton St. Pierre
This rivalry began in Season 2 of Future Shock, and it ends here. The best part about this is, once Sophies done with Payton, there’s absolutely nothing that St. Pierre will be able to do to excuse her way out of this. If you want a fan-favorite up and comer whupping a loud mouthed rivals ass, you’ve come to the right place.
WINNER: Richards
1. CHASE FOR THE CROWN FINAL: #8 Crystal Hilton vs. #10 Wendy Briese
I’m a manager, dammit! I get to hype my own wrestler every once in a while! It was fairly apparent that when the Chase came down to the end, these would be the two there, and now its a tough battle. You look at what happened in INdy, and I think Wendy actually took it personally, while for Crystal it seemed business as usual. So is it going to fire Wendy up, or throw her off her game? I’ve been around long enough to know the answer, and soon you will too.
WINNER: Briese
One other point to note in the coming weeks- so far, only five women have been announced for the Chase. And so far, I’ve been right in picking those five- Scarlett, Isabella, Kaitlynn, Valerie, and Amy. But now there’s only one spot remaining... so who does it go to? Of course, it could be another Amy- a returning big name who parachutes in at the eleventh hour. But something tells me that it won’t be.
I’m gonna make a prediction, and it’s gonna come from left field, so brace yourselves.
Robbyn Helmsley.
Do I see Helmsley as the next world champion? No. But save for her loss in that six man tag match, Helmsley’s been VERY hot over the past couple of months, including two big wins in the last cycle alone. Everyone above her in my rankings is either in the match (Kincaid, I. Pazzini, Stryfe, Belmont), defending a title (C. Pazzini, Colleen, Richards), or probably too new to merit consideration (Hilton). So why not her?
And I know she’s supposed to challenge Collen at Unstoppable, but thats a three way. Take her out, and Colleen merely faces Wendy... erm, the Chase winner, in a singles match. It’s not an implausible scenario.
Anyways, that’s my idea. We’ll see if I’m right.
*AWARDS!*
Hope you’re as excited as I am for this.
When I started doing guest awards with the last column, never in my life did I think that I’d be handing my column over to the head bosslady herself. But Samantha Star hit me up, and nicely asked if she could do awards this week, and how could I say no to someone like her?
So without further ado... Miss Star (with runner-ups done by me, of course)
=====================================
It is a rare thing indeed for me, Samantha Star, to take the time out of my busy schedule to be part of a “blog”. But after having read the last two columns written by Mr. Pollaski and the fact he was asking for some genuine insight into FFW, I felt compelled to do so. Because let’s face it, the only opinion in FFW that matters overall is that of the person who signs the checks. So without further ado...
MATCH OF THE WEEK
Last Woman Standing - Camilla Pazzini vs. Colleen
I don’t appreciate people who don’t appreciate what I’ve done for them! Since Colleen signed a FFW contract, she has gotten nothing but opportunities to shine. And the fact that she complains even in defeat as much as she does in victory didn’t even weigh on my mind when this match was booked. Colleen made an error, she went to Aggression without my permission. And this is what happens when you irritate me. You get punished. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow, but I never forget when I owe someone. Consider your debt paid in full, Colleen.
RUNNERS UP
- Amy vs. Isabella Pazzini (short, sweet, and nothing short of brutal!)
- Crystal Hilton vs. Kassandra vs. Wendy Briese (All the girls nearly brought the house down, and some of the wrinkles towards the end were classic)
WINNER OF THE WEEK
Isabella Pazzini
It was so refreshing to watch Isabella beat the total hell out of Amy at Breaking Point. I don’t understand why anyone cheers for her. She is a spotlight whore, whom by all accounts I’ve heard, hasn’t really changed at all. And the sheer fact that Isabella destroyed her served only to put a smile on my face backstage as I watched the match. The only downside is that she didn’t put her back into retirement. I am assured that will come at Unstoppable 2.
RUNNERS UP
- Alyson Summers (Future Shock Season 3. Whoda thunk)
- Robbyn Helmsley (Two huge wins, and her stock is steadily rising)
LOSER OF THE WEEK
Nina Astral
How many times must I book this woman against talent she has no hopes of overcoming, only to watch her come back for more? I’ll give her credit. At least she hasn’t quit yet, unlike her schizophrenic mother. Nina is like those children who sit in the back row in school. Slow, dim-witted, borderline mentally challenged, and likely sticking their tongues to cold windows to see what happens.
RUNNERS UP
- Colleen (Just can’t get over Camilla’s humps, which are admittedly big)
- Kassandra (Backslides not a concern- yet. But don’t let it become one.)
DOUCHEBAG OF THE WEEK
Crystal Hilton
I can not lie and say I wasn’t enormously amused as I watched Crystal Hilton steal the win from Wendy at Velocity! Normally I only find such cunning people within my own inner circle of friends, but Crystal impressed me with that! Only a “douchebag” would go out of her way to embarrass a girl in her own hometown, not to mention start a chant for her during the start of the match to mock her. In this case, Crystal can actually consider this an award because if she wanted to get my attention, if she wanted to impress me, she has done both! I’ll be watching the finals very close at Breaking Point.
RUNNERS UP
- The Lovehearts (First Destiny tweets that she hopes her own sister gets destroyed. Then Traci walks out on her. Dysfunctional family is dysfunctional)
- Belladonna (Dumb bitch. Running away and dodging Hayley? BOO!)
Well, once again, that does it for another edition of the Power X. Thanks for all of you who read, and a super special thanks to Samantha Star for her contribution. And we hope to see you again, in two weeks, with another batch of rankings, and a preview of UNSTOPPABLE 2!
Until then... Polla Out!
Daniel Pollaski is an freelance wrestling columnist, SVW wrestler, and the manager of Wendy Briese. He’d like to congratulate Nathan McFarlane and OMG on well deserved title wins at Climax. And FUCK Rory O'Connel, yo.
Well, what did I tell you? Momentum has absolutely no effect on Stryfe. When it looks like she’s getting hot, she loses. When it looks like she’s jumped the shark, she wins. Which sets up interestingly- Stryfe’s loss to Helmsley was hardly momentum killing, so what happens at Unstoppable? For good or ill, Stryfe will likely manage to go the opposite way of the expected.
#10- WENDY BRIESE [+2]
Wendy’s far from happy about how it went about, but she really has no room to gripe- she’s gotten herself right where she wants to be as the Chase comes to a conclusion. Throw in a match with Kaitlynn Stryfe in a couple of days, and the fact is clear- there is NO ONE with more to gain in FFW over the next two weeks than this woman.
#9- ROBBYN HELMSLEY [+6]
Supergirl’s back in the top 10 after two impressive victories. First she downs Stryfe, and while her victory over Kassandra is less impressive from a strength of opponent standpoint, the fact remains it’s a good way to wipe a blemish from her record- Kassi submitted her just a month ago. So with that hiccup clean, its full speed ahead for Robbyn as she prepares to challenge Colleen again for the Evolution title. Or.. will she? Read on :D
#8- CRYSTAL HILTON [+3]
Hilton emerges from Indianapolis the darling newcomer of FFW, and the way she’s been, it’s tough to argue with that. Still, I think Hilton’s warped sense of reality is eventually going to come back and bite her, and what better time than in two weeks at Breaking Point?
#7- VALERIE BELMONT [+1]
Those who watched Climax last night know that Val had a chance to come away the SVW World Champion, but ultimately came up short against her brother. All’s not lost, though- Val’s right back in the title hunt here in FFW in just four weeks. And wouldn’t that be something, if the McFarlane clan secures a stranglehold of both major wrestling titles in the world today?
#6- SOPHIE RICHARDS [+1]
*FFW TELEVISION CHAMPION*
Before Unstoppable, Payton St. Pierre had irritated Sophie to the point where Sophie was ready to forego the TV title to get at her. Well, now its time for her to put her money where her mouth is- she’s got Payton, there are no rules, and its all or nothing!
#5- COLLEEN [No Change]
*FFW EVOLUTION CHAMPION*
Colleen took time from her busy schedule of being pissed off at the world to show up on Breaking Point, and make sure in no uncertain terms that she feels she has Robbyns number. Wouldn’t be surprised if she shows up after the Chase finale in a couple weeks, as well. In the meantime, Colleen’s likely going to be working harder and harder- she’s got a championship to retain.
#4- KAITLYNN STRYFE [No Change]
Kitty-Mac has been quiet since Conviction, but it’s time for her to make some noise yet again. Her match against Wendy notwithstanding, there are some serious unfriendly faces walkiing into the Chamber against her at Unstoppable- Valerie Belmont chief among those names.
#3- CAMILLA PAZZINI [No Change]
*FFW ULTRAVIOLENCE CHAMPION*
Camilla downed Colleen for a second time, and this time, there’s no controversy. Still, it was a match that definitely favored Chunks, but you gotta tip your hat to ‘Hardcore Hotness’. Now, can she keep that title (and her title) at Unstoppable, with Raven Wicked coming into the Prison of Punishment?
#2- ISABELLA PAZZINI [-1]
Back to #2 for Bella- the #1 thing was a one-time deal to prove a point. Still, the futures looking bright for Pazzini after her win over Amy. How bright? Well, we’ll find out at Unstoppable.
#1- SCARLETT KINCAID [No Change]
*FFW CHAMPION*
Scarlett hops back into the ring to face Michelle Taylor in what should ultimately amount to little more than a warm-up match for Unstoppable. Once she’s ‘carped’ her ‘diem’, the focus returns to defending her title- over five women, no less!
And there we have it!
Of course, comments are welcome below, and people actually deigned to comment this time, so thanks to the two who did! And yours truly received no less than THREE mentions in promos over the past couple of weeks, which means this column is getting read, and getting read hard!
So a big thanks there.
Now, enough mushy bullshit... onto
*FUTURE SHOCK THERAPY!*
Season three is over, and Alyson Summers is the winner, pulling out all the stops (and nearly killing herself) against Kelly Allen to get the win. Not bad, considering that my Season 3 preview tagged her with most annoying, and I figured she’d be gone by the third show. She’s still annoying, but it’s a lot harder to get on that when you have FUTURE SHOCK CHAMPION added to the end of your name.
So congrats, Aly. Look forward to seeing you in the big leagues.
Well, FFW doesn’t like to keep us waiting, and Season 4 is already a go. Six new rookies join the fray, and they had the ‘honor’ of being introduced by our champion. That gets into quotes because if you saw the preview show, you were treated to Scarlett Kincaid putting on the most cheesy, absolute shameless shill job in promotional history. How bad was it? When I watched the show with Wendy, Wendy looked at me and said “What the hell is she doing?”
Congrats Scar, you got Wendy to swear. She will categorically deny this, btw. But it’s true. I’m a witness.
Now, onto the wrestlers themselves, and my first impressions.
THE FAVE: Devin Knight
No, this isn’t me getting a Club CK hard-on. First of all, anything you know about the Knights (aka, the retarded duo of Maddi and Keegan) throw out the fucking window. Devin is much more intelligent than either of her siblings. And she’s an vet, who has a tough as nails attitude. From what I’ve seen- she looks like the early fave.
MEOWZ!: Hanna Elliot
Unforunately, after a bevy of them in Season 3, Season 4 lacks a single redhead, which makes us ginger-lovers sad. So, coming up with the hottest wrestler is a bit tougher this time around, but its hard to overlook the smokin’ Ms. Elliot, who apparently comes from a more- nontraditional sort of wrestling background. Even if she wont’ have a clue what she’s doing, she’ll be fun to watch!
DARK HORSE: Desirae Kain
She’s got the look, she’s got the attitude, and she’s got Simon Sensation in her corner. While I’m not quite picking her over the other DK quite yet... expect Kain to make a hell of a dent.
… REALLY?: Arabella de Rossi
With all due respect to the women currently occupying the 2 and 3 spots in my rankings, I think FFW has just about all it can handle of Italian women with fairly high opinions of themselves. Throwing in the Pazzini’s biggest fan into the mix isn’t exactly my idea of a novel concept. Maybe she’s getting the short end of the stick, but until Arabella does something worth note, my eyes are elsewhere.
VOTES OUT: Gigante
I’m gonna say it- the vast majority of ‘big’ women wrestlers suck. Now, I’m not against a behildabeast squashing the fuck out of some brainless blonde bimbo once in a while, but the fact is, most of the big girls seem to think that just because they’re not the best looking, that automatically makes them a better wrestler. I’ve covered wrestling for ten years, and I can safely say I’ve never seen it done better than Rose Jenkins. Maybe she’s got what it takes, but Gigante has a long way to go to get to that level.
*YAWN*: Alyssa Foxworth
If you follow the FFW and SVW feeds on Twitter (and I don’t blame you if you don’t), you’ve seen Alyssa pop up from time to time to remind us how much better her life is. Yeah, she has money. Yeah, she’s Seth Star’s fiancee. But what Alyssa’s got in money and *ahem* refinement, she so far lacks in anything interesting to bring to the table. THere ain’t enough money in the world to buy her way out of being eliminated on the first vote.
All in all, this doesn’t seem as solid a class as we got in Season 3- which honestly could produce five top-level FFW superstars when all is said and done. Right now, I got two, maybe three girls here who can possibly make it in the big leagues. We’ll see.
*LOOKING AHEAD*
Alright, final cycle of shows before the big dance of Unstoppable, and ten more matches on the table. Top five- countdown!
5. THREE WAY: #23 Whitley Mercer vs. #24 Hayley Dark vs. Mindy Smyth
Eight women are set to compete in the Pick Your Poison ladder match at Unstoppable, and here, three of them throw down. Now, believe it or not, I’ve actually seen newcomer Smyth before, since she was in the small indy women’s fed Missouri Valley Wrestling. There were some talented girls there, but Mindy’s hardly at the top of my list of MVW girls who could make the jump to the big leagues. Mercer’s on an upswing, but the way Hayley Dark is going right now, its tough to pick against her in anything.
WINNER: Dark
4. #5 Colleen vs. #25 Gretchen Donimari
Colleen’s coming off a tough loss to Camilla Pazzini, and she’s gotta be furious. Gretchen’s coming off a win she hopes can turn her career around. Honestly, as much as I love Gretchen, this just seems to big a hill for her to climb at this point in her career. Still, there’s a lot of heart in that young lady, and I’m not about to totally rule out an upset.
WINNER: Colleen
3. #4 Kaitlynn Stryfe vs. #10 Wendy Briese
Wendy’s finally crawled her way into my top 10, and I couldn’t be prouder of her. But THESE are the kind of matches she needs to win if she hopes to get to the next level. Stryfe’s got a feather in her cap from Conviction, but I wouldn’t be a good manager if I didn’t pick my client, right?
WINNER: Briese
2. FFW TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP- NO HOLDS BARRED: #6 Sophi.e Richards © vs. #18 Payton St. Pierre
This rivalry began in Season 2 of Future Shock, and it ends here. The best part about this is, once Sophies done with Payton, there’s absolutely nothing that St. Pierre will be able to do to excuse her way out of this. If you want a fan-favorite up and comer whupping a loud mouthed rivals ass, you’ve come to the right place.
WINNER: Richards
1. CHASE FOR THE CROWN FINAL: #8 Crystal Hilton vs. #10 Wendy Briese
I’m a manager, dammit! I get to hype my own wrestler every once in a while! It was fairly apparent that when the Chase came down to the end, these would be the two there, and now its a tough battle. You look at what happened in INdy, and I think Wendy actually took it personally, while for Crystal it seemed business as usual. So is it going to fire Wendy up, or throw her off her game? I’ve been around long enough to know the answer, and soon you will too.
WINNER: Briese
One other point to note in the coming weeks- so far, only five women have been announced for the Chase. And so far, I’ve been right in picking those five- Scarlett, Isabella, Kaitlynn, Valerie, and Amy. But now there’s only one spot remaining... so who does it go to? Of course, it could be another Amy- a returning big name who parachutes in at the eleventh hour. But something tells me that it won’t be.
I’m gonna make a prediction, and it’s gonna come from left field, so brace yourselves.
Robbyn Helmsley.
Do I see Helmsley as the next world champion? No. But save for her loss in that six man tag match, Helmsley’s been VERY hot over the past couple of months, including two big wins in the last cycle alone. Everyone above her in my rankings is either in the match (Kincaid, I. Pazzini, Stryfe, Belmont), defending a title (C. Pazzini, Colleen, Richards), or probably too new to merit consideration (Hilton). So why not her?
And I know she’s supposed to challenge Collen at Unstoppable, but thats a three way. Take her out, and Colleen merely faces Wendy... erm, the Chase winner, in a singles match. It’s not an implausible scenario.
Anyways, that’s my idea. We’ll see if I’m right.
*AWARDS!*
Hope you’re as excited as I am for this.
When I started doing guest awards with the last column, never in my life did I think that I’d be handing my column over to the head bosslady herself. But Samantha Star hit me up, and nicely asked if she could do awards this week, and how could I say no to someone like her?
So without further ado... Miss Star (with runner-ups done by me, of course)
=====================================
It is a rare thing indeed for me, Samantha Star, to take the time out of my busy schedule to be part of a “blog”. But after having read the last two columns written by Mr. Pollaski and the fact he was asking for some genuine insight into FFW, I felt compelled to do so. Because let’s face it, the only opinion in FFW that matters overall is that of the person who signs the checks. So without further ado...
MATCH OF THE WEEK
Last Woman Standing - Camilla Pazzini vs. Colleen
I don’t appreciate people who don’t appreciate what I’ve done for them! Since Colleen signed a FFW contract, she has gotten nothing but opportunities to shine. And the fact that she complains even in defeat as much as she does in victory didn’t even weigh on my mind when this match was booked. Colleen made an error, she went to Aggression without my permission. And this is what happens when you irritate me. You get punished. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow, but I never forget when I owe someone. Consider your debt paid in full, Colleen.
RUNNERS UP
- Amy vs. Isabella Pazzini (short, sweet, and nothing short of brutal!)
- Crystal Hilton vs. Kassandra vs. Wendy Briese (All the girls nearly brought the house down, and some of the wrinkles towards the end were classic)
WINNER OF THE WEEK
Isabella Pazzini
It was so refreshing to watch Isabella beat the total hell out of Amy at Breaking Point. I don’t understand why anyone cheers for her. She is a spotlight whore, whom by all accounts I’ve heard, hasn’t really changed at all. And the sheer fact that Isabella destroyed her served only to put a smile on my face backstage as I watched the match. The only downside is that she didn’t put her back into retirement. I am assured that will come at Unstoppable 2.
RUNNERS UP
- Alyson Summers (Future Shock Season 3. Whoda thunk)
- Robbyn Helmsley (Two huge wins, and her stock is steadily rising)
LOSER OF THE WEEK
Nina Astral
How many times must I book this woman against talent she has no hopes of overcoming, only to watch her come back for more? I’ll give her credit. At least she hasn’t quit yet, unlike her schizophrenic mother. Nina is like those children who sit in the back row in school. Slow, dim-witted, borderline mentally challenged, and likely sticking their tongues to cold windows to see what happens.
RUNNERS UP
- Colleen (Just can’t get over Camilla’s humps, which are admittedly big)
- Kassandra (Backslides not a concern- yet. But don’t let it become one.)
DOUCHEBAG OF THE WEEK
Crystal Hilton
I can not lie and say I wasn’t enormously amused as I watched Crystal Hilton steal the win from Wendy at Velocity! Normally I only find such cunning people within my own inner circle of friends, but Crystal impressed me with that! Only a “douchebag” would go out of her way to embarrass a girl in her own hometown, not to mention start a chant for her during the start of the match to mock her. In this case, Crystal can actually consider this an award because if she wanted to get my attention, if she wanted to impress me, she has done both! I’ll be watching the finals very close at Breaking Point.
RUNNERS UP
- The Lovehearts (First Destiny tweets that she hopes her own sister gets destroyed. Then Traci walks out on her. Dysfunctional family is dysfunctional)
- Belladonna (Dumb bitch. Running away and dodging Hayley? BOO!)
Well, once again, that does it for another edition of the Power X. Thanks for all of you who read, and a super special thanks to Samantha Star for her contribution. And we hope to see you again, in two weeks, with another batch of rankings, and a preview of UNSTOPPABLE 2!
Until then... Polla Out!
Daniel Pollaski is an freelance wrestling columnist, SVW wrestler, and the manager of Wendy Briese. He’d like to congratulate Nathan McFarlane and OMG on well deserved title wins at Climax. And FUCK Rory O'Connel, yo.
I think your insistence on having the champion as #1 is becoming... problematic. While Scarlett rides the easy wave thanks to Cody's... interesting booking, I have been working hard and dominating. What more do I have to do to be #1? Seriously? Everyone knows I'm the best, and I proved it against Amy.
ReplyDeleteHaving said that, aside from that "blip", this was an entertaining read. I'd like to see Robbyn in the chamber. So I can prove she's as weak and pathetic as I always said she was.
If Ms. Star's idea of punishment is to give my client huge opportunities, perhaps I should get Colleen to sign an SVW contract. In only my client's second hardcore match, she nearly knocked Camilla Pazzini out, and lost merely through a careless mistake which would be easily avoided in the future. Giving Colleen more winnable matches against hall of famers is hardly something either of us would be upset about. I assure you.
ReplyDeletePollaski, you're a fuckin' brilliant man. And I don't say that often. It amuses me that I'm your pick for #6 in the chamber, and it would be a privileged to go in and show the contenders how to really make this 'Champion' ROAR.
ReplyDeleteBut the match with Colleen and the #1 contender be it Wendy or Crystal needs to have a spark, a flare. And I'm just the person to put it there... I love the idea however I'm happy where Miss Star puts me, and I will not ruffle any feathers.
As for the back handed comment that Izzy made... FUCK YA!