Power X- January 1, 2012

Once again, its time for wrestling manager and analyst Daniel Pollaski to go over the news, reviews, and previews of Femme Fatale Wrestling! All content is the sole opinion of the author and does not reflect the views of Femme Fatale Wrestling, its wrestlers, or administration. Or Wendy Briese, for that matter, so don’t go jumping her in the hallway if you get butthurt about this. Bitch.

The Power X’s inspirational thought of the week.

We're leaving together

But still it's farewell

And maybe we'll come back

To earth, who can tell?

I guess there is no one to blame

We're leaving ground

Will things ever be the same again?

It's the final countdown

The final countdown

We're heading for Venus and still we stand tall

'Cause maybe they've seen us and welcome us all, yea

With so many light years to go and things to be found

I'm sure that we'll all miss her so

It's the final countdown

The final countdown

-       “The Final Countdown” Europe

Hey kids!

I hope everyone had a very happy and safe New Year.   I know I did, even though I got punked by a stupid bitch named Whitley Mercer.  Yeah, that little bit of bullshit did put a bit of a damper on the evening.  Other than that, what a show!  So much going on, and so many awesome matches!  Colleen vs. Strike and Birdz vs. Stark & Stone especially are going to rate as some of the best matches of the year.

But now that 2011 is in the books, its time to do, well, the Final Countdown of the year.  This is the first of two year-end columns that I’ll be doing, with the second one hopefully up in a couple of days- a mega-comprehensive end-all be-all look at the previous year (well, from Full Frontal on, considering that’s when I kinda came in).  This one, however, is just going to be your normal run-of-the-mill version of Pollaski awesomeness.

RANKINGS!

For those of you who religiously follow the Power-X (and seriously, you totally suck if you don’t), you might have noticed that over the past couple of weeks, the number of people on the list has shrunken.  Around late summer, we were sporting a whopping forty-seven women on the Power-X rankings list, the last installment merely saw thirty-six.  Well, don’t worry, folks!  No one’s gotten dropped this time around, and we have a whopping SIX women returning to the rankings after a brief hiatus.  Add three newcomers to that list, and we’ve ballooned back to a respectable forty-five women on the January 1 edition. 

Since it’s a new year, and we’ve gotten a lot of new people paying attention since I started this, let me take a moment to give a quick reminder of the Power X rules.

1.     To be eligible for the Power-X, wrestler must have competed on either the last two show cycles (generally either a Velocity-Breaking Point combination, or a PPV), or be booked in the next one.  After all, there’s no point in trying to come up with interesting things to write about you if you don’t freakin’ do anything.

2.     The FFW Champion will always be ranked #1.  There is no guaranteed ranking for any other wrestler, regardless of what titles they hold.

3.     All rankings are subjective, and are the sole opinion of myself.  These are unofficial, and hold no bearing on a wrestler’s official status in Femme Fatale Wrestling, or elsewhere.  Although I would like to remind you that I’m FFW’s Most Influential.  Wherever I say you are, I can promise you nine times out of ten that the brass of this company have a similar opinion.

4.     I reserve the right to bend or break these rules at my discretion.  This is MY column after all.

  And just in case anyone was wondering, yes, New Years Retribution did count in terms of my rankings. 

Alright, so who’s ready to rock?  As usual, I reserve my highlights for the Top 25, which means if you’re on the following list, you’ve got some serious work to do.  Anyways here are those who didn’t quite make the cut this time around.

#45- CHARITY DEAS [-9]

#44- TRACI LOVEHEART [Returning- Last Ranked 41^st on November 2]

#43- SOPHIA BLACK [-8]

#42- ALYSSA FOXWORTH [-11]

#41- SARAH RICHARDSON [Returning- Last Ranked 38^th on November 2]

#40- CHARLOTTE GAGE [-6]

#39- STEPHANIE SULLIVAN [Returning- Last ranked 39^th on September 29]

#38- TABATHA BELMONT [-5]

#37- LUMINA FERRARI [-7]

#36- KASSANDRA [-7]

#35- KIMBERLY ARIES [NEW]

#34- ELIZABETH SHOWTIME [-6]

#33- ALLISON DEAS [-6]

#32- REBBECCA VALENTINE [--]

#31- LIGHTNING [NEW]

#30- IGNIS [Returning- Last ranked 19^th on November 2]

#29- HANNA ELLIOT [-8]

#28- ARABELLA DE ROSSI [-4]

#27- JO MCFARLANE [-5]

#26- HAYLEY DARK [Returning- Last Ranked 16^th on November 2]

Yeah, I know, a lot of people dropped here, and not an insignificant amount of spots either.  Kinda happens when nine people enter the rankings.

Alright, so now, the final top 25 of 2011… here we go!

#25- ARIANNA MILLAR [--]

*FFW UNITY TAG TEAM CHAMPION*

With a successful defense over the Eternal Flame, Arianna is certainly establishing herself as a surprise in the tag team rankings- remember, it was commonly thought as an awful decision when Desirae picked her as her partner.  But things are working out rather well for the time being, although we still have yet to see what Arianna can do by herself in FFW competition.

#24- ALYSSON GARDNER [+2]

It took a couple weeks longer than expected, but Alysson has finally found her way into the top 25 with an impressive victory over Sarah Richardson.  She’s got her sights set on Stephanie Sullivan come Cold-Blooded, but first, a redhead vs. redhead matchup when Alysson takes on the (dyed) Rebbecca Valentine.

#23- CARA STONE [NEW]

Like I said, New Year’s Retribution did count for these rankings, and that was technically Cara’s first match as a member of the FFW roster.  And what a match it was- trust me when I say that beating the WhirlyBirdz, ring rust or no ring rust, is hardly a small feat.  Couple that with Cara’s impressive performance in the fifth season of Future Shock, and she has to be pegged as an early favorite in the Pick Your Poison ladder match.

#22- SUMMER [+1]

In professional wrestling, someone’s loss is someone else’s gain, and that holds very true in the case of this bubbly young lady.  With Kassandra having to pull out due to an injury, Summer finds herself facing Lumina for a chance to move into a spot in the No Surrender championship.  What a big break for her!

#21- EMMA MCINTYRE [-2]

It’s been quiet from the Former Champion after her loss to Queen Machine at Violent Night, but she did do a stellar job as a ring announcer at NYR.  And, let’s be honest, her chucking of former partner Katherine Stryfe under the bus was, well, beautiful. 

#20- KELLY MCGUFFIN [--]

Kelly’s epic beatdown of Sophia Black to a surprising turn for the disappointing after Sophia managed to cheat her way into a disqualification, and avoid her fate.  Consider it a postponement- the rematch is set for Cold Blooded, and will be a Prison of Punishment match!

#19- CRYSTAL HATE [-1]

Unfortunately for Crystal, Sophie proved to be too much for her, and Hate found her bid for the Television Championship coming up a bit on the short side.  Fortunately for the rest of us, Crystal and her sisters proved to be too much for Don Tirri, and we all got a great view of that coven beating the living holy hell out of him at NYR.

#18- QUEEN MACHINE [-1]

After coming off a great momentum building win over Emma McIntyre at Violent Night, you’d have thought that Jenny would have been sent back into that ring to capitalize on her success.  Unfortunately, that doesn’t quite seem to be the case here, as Jenny won’t be getting back into the ring until she faces Kaitlynn Stryfe.  That’s not a good opponent to have ring rust against.

#17- SHANE SANDERS [-2]

After a great win over Jo McFarlane, Shane’s momentum took a bit of a hiccup when she and her brother teamed up against Jo and Arabella at NYR.  Still, that might be adding a bit of fuel to the fire for Shane, she’s getting Arabella again when she and Eileen faces the Violent Femmes… and she’s definitely out to prove that her win over Colleen was anything but a fluke.

#16- RAVEN WICKED [-2]

The Ultraviolence title might not be on the line this time, but this is an absolutely critical match for Raven, who is in danger of being shunted out of the UV title picture for the time being as the focus more and more is on Camilla and Rose.  She can change that at Velocity, by pulling off an upset over Camilla in a No Holds Barred match.  Don’t scoff, she’s done it once already!

#15- DESIRAE KAIN [+1]

*FFW UNITY TAG TEAM CHAMPION*

You know, I’m kind of surprised we haven’t had a bitching session from Katherine Stryfe yet that she had to wrestle twice at Unstoppable, yet Desirae Kain gets a more accommodating schedule.  Now that she’s not wrestling twice in the night, Desirae’s chances of walking out of Cold Blooded with the Tag Team belts… and maybe a singles title to go along with them, has increased dramatically.

#14- CASEY ATHERTON [-1]

Hey, Casey!  Pay no attention to what that mean Gabrielle Crimson said about you being a criminal.  The only thing you’ve stolen is my heart.  And yeah, maybe a few trophies as well.  But personally, I know I sleep better at night thinking that Casey won Season 3 instead of Alysson Summers, don’t you?

#13- ROSE JENKINS [-1]

If Rose wanted to help me win my match at NYR, maybe she should have focused on stopping Shitley Mercer from jumping me from behind, instead of doing a miserably executed attack on Camilla.  Like I said on Twitter, just because she needed help to beat Michelle Taylor doesn’t mean everyone else needs assistance.  And that’s why Chunks is going to be pulling a hat trick on good ol’ Rosie come Cold-Blooded

#12- ISABELLA PAZZINI [Returning- Last ranked 10^th on November 2]

After a couple of months of being on the back burner, Isabella’s gotten pretty busy over the past couple weeks, first saving Wendy from a savage attack by Crystal Hilton, and then beating Gary Gilray at NYR.  Next up, a rematch with Starla McCloud… if anyone saw the travesty of the first one… you’ll know why a lot of people are looking forward to this.  At least Alvin Shepherd isn’t going to be a ref this time.

#11- EILEEN AMARO [-1]

Eileen’s been a little… angrier over the past couple of weeks.  Mainly at Colleen, but if you’re on the A-List, you probably didn’t make her Christmas card list.  Luckily for her, she’s going to get a chance to blow off some serious steam against the Violent Femmes next week, followed by what should be an absolute tearing of Alyssa Foxworth at Cold-Blooded.

#10- SOPHIE RICHARDS [-1]

*FFW TELEVISION CHAMPON*

Crystal Hate put up a fight, but Sophie managed to dispatch her, and retain what has suddenly become the hottest belt in the company in terms of people lining up to challenge for this.  Next up is Desirae Kain, who could be very very dangerous.

#9- KAITLYNN STRYFE [-3]

Kitty’s been quiet since her loss to Scarlett, but she gets back into the swing of things against Charlotte Gage, which should amount to little more than a warmup match.  The big challenge is Queen Machine, who could be a very very stiff challenge at Cold Blooded

#8- KATHERINE STRYFE [-4]

I’m starting to wonder if Kat is one of those people who manages to be very successful against one opponent (Kaitlynn Stryfe), yet struggles against pretty much anyone else.  A loss against Crystal Hilton certainly suggests that once again, Stryfe is going to be drifting back in the pack.

#7- CRYSTAL HILTON [+4]

Crystal was a busy, busy girl over the past couple of weeks, first of all jumping Cheers and Jeers, then Wendy Briese, and then pulling out some shenanigans to down the recently dethroned FFW Champion.  She’s off until Cold Blooded, which gives her plenty of time to come up with the spell she’ll need to beat Isabella Pazzini

#6- TARA THUNDER [+2]

*FFW EVOLUTION CHAMPION*

You have got to give Tara credit.  After her loss the first time around to Hanna Elliot, she treated it as a wake up call, turned around, and pulled off not just a huge win over Crystal Hilton, but then avenged her loss by beating Elliot to retain the belt.  Tara better be careful to keep up the momentum though… otherwise history is going to be repeating itself against Melanie Avilo.

#5- WENDY BRIESE [--]

The ‘final flight’ of the WhirlyBirdz ended in a disappointment for Wendy, but at this point, she is right where she wants to be in her singles career.  She got the win over the upset-minded Stephanie Sullivan, and she’s headed to Cold Blooded to fight for the No Surrender Championship.  Now to deliver the goods.

#4- COLLEEN [+3]

You can’t rebound any better than that.  Colleen followed up her disappointing losses to Stacey and Shane by putting on a beautiful performance against Chris Strike in her hometown.  A gutsy win against an equally gutsy performance, and Colleen’s ascent back into the top 5 is well-deserved.  But you can tell the ghost of her loss to Sanders is bothering her- why else would she have demanded the rematch?

#3- CAMILLA PAZZINI [--]

*FFW ULTRAVIOLENCE CHAMPION*

Considering who Chunks has beaten in the past few months, how awesome would it have been if I had been able to pull off the monster upset last night?  Alas, thanks to stupid Whitley Mercer, Chunks maintains her victory, and her show spot in the rankings.  Although I can’t help but wonder how much fun it would have been to drop her for losing to me.  Ah, well.

#2- SCARLETT KINCAID [--]

Considering how much bullshit Johnny Moxie manages to get away with, a DQ win isn’t really anything to scoff at.  Especially because when bullshit wasn’t raining down from the sky, Scarlett was kicking Moxie’s ass all over the arena.  Now, Scarlett’s got one mission- take back her title.

#1- STACEY MACKENZIE [--]

*FFW CHAMPION*

Despite apparent allegations that Stacey is sitting on her title like a coward, The Simply Better Dreamkiller seems to be in good shape.  She’s going to need all the rest she can get, after all.  She’s got herself a biiiig defense coming up at Cold Blooded!

And there you have it, kids!  The final rankings of 2011!

INCOMING!

So we are now in the final push towards Cold Blooded, and as such, two more shows coming at you.  Here’s a quick rundown of what you can expect.

VELOCITY- January 5 from Kansas City, Missouri

Man, I fucking hate the Sprint Center.  It just makes me sad, because when I was a kid living in KCK, it was always the Kemper Arena.  But I know, times they are a changing, and arenas come and go.  Anyways, my feelings on the venue aside, we’re looking at a pretty damn stuffed card here.  Christine Smith, the newly signed “Queen Predator” goes up against Crystal Hate.  Not sure what all Christine’s going to bring to the table here, but she better be ready to bring it, Crystal’s welcomed a few newcomers already to FFW, and most of them haven’t been warm.  Next up, a bonafide ass-whupping on the table, as Rose Jenkins takes on… dear god help us… TWISTED PATH 2.0.   And no, that’s not an upgrade.  Of course, I wouldn’t be shocked if Camilla comes out to ‘help’ Rose during this, either.

The final spot in the No Surrender match at Cold Blooded is on the line as Lumina Ferrari, who’s getting a second chance here after a stunning loss to Kassandra a couple months  ago, goes up against Summer, who’s been very dangerous ever since her debut just a month or so ago.  Jo McFarlane, coming off two straight losses, hopes to get a bit of momentum back against Sophia Black, who seems hellbent in getting as big a bounty on her head as she possibly can.

If Camilla fucked with Rose earlier in the night, expect a bit of payback in the next match, when Chunks goes up against Rose Jenkins in a nontitle NHB match.  Then again, considering how much Rose is fed up with Cammie, Rose might be making her presence known regardless.  And in the main event, it’s Isabella Pazzini returning to the FFW ring to take on Starla McCloud.  I can guarantee you one thing- my girl Wendy will be watching this one very closely, both as a scouting chance, and considering the shenanigans that seem to arise whenever Starla McCloud wrestles.

BREAKING POINT- January 14 in Boise, Idaho

SMURFS!  Seriously, there aren’t many people out there who want to go to Boise in the middle of the winter, but as far as yours truly is concerned, its always welcome to go home to the land of the Broncos and the Blue turf.  Kicking things off is creepy-horny Future Shock 5 participant Elizabeth Blackwell, making her FFW debut in what should amount to a curbstomping of Charity Deas.  The dominance theme should continue into the next match, when the vicious Kaitlynn Stryfe hopes to send a message to Queen Machine by whooping Charlie Gage’s ass all over the Potato Bowl.

The Competition only ramps up from there, with Alysson Gardner going up against Rebbecca Valentine.  Becky’s high on her horse coming off a huge win for the Eternal Flame over OMGWTF, but at the same time, Rebbecca’s singles record is, well, lacking.  A shitload.  More redhead on redhead action follows in the next match, when Future Shock 3 alumnis Ignis and Casey Atherton collide- a shame, given that Iggy doesn’t yet have any accolades for Casey to steal.

Security better be ready for the next one, which should amount to nothing short of a hate-filled war when Eileen Amaro and Shane Sanders tangle with the A-List.  Not sure if Eileen and Shane are as focused on the tag titles as the Violent Femmes are, but the fact of the matter is both women would LOVE to get their hands on the A-Listers.  And gold is on the line in the main event of the evening, as Sophie Richards defends her title again, this time against Desirae Kain.  Richards has  to be a favorite, considering her track record, but remember, Desirae is at her best when you don’t see her coming.

AWARDS!

As has been mentioned several times before (and face it, you already knew it anyways), New Years Retribution was last night, and by all accounts (including mine) it was a phenomenal show.  So who better to give today’s awards than the mastermind behind that show, not to mention the general manager of FFW’s Velocity show, AND FFW & SVW announcer.  All around great guy… MARK HORTON!

Take it away, Marky!

Match of the Week

Colleen vs. Chris Strike - New Year’s Retribution

This one was rather difficult for me, because there were several good nominees, including the TV Championship match between Sophie & Crystal Hate at Breaking Point. But this match here was just a pure clinic of how you enthrall an audience. Even given the fact that the crowd was very pro-Colleen, they still showed enthusiasm and respect for both wrestlers! I was happy to see Colleen pick up this huge win in her hometown no less. And I am certainly of the mind that that this cracked ceiling is about to shatter. Good show by both, I was honored to be able to present it!

Hard to argue this point.  It was a great way to close out the show.  Although Colleen actually being cheered felt… odd.  Runners up!

-       Richards vs. Hate (Mark’s right, this was a tough call.  That was a good match, and easily the hardest I’ve yet seen Crystal fight.  Hate may have come up short, but she’s going to get another chance sooner rather than later, and Sophie better watch out when she does)

-       WhirlyBirdz VHS vs. Stark & Stone (Is this a homer pick?  Possibly.  Is it justified?  You’re damn fucking right it is.  There was no shortage of anything in this match, intensity, athleticism, and most of all, respect.  Like Wendy said afterwards, if it was the final flight of the WhirlyBirdz, it was a damn good one)

Winner of the Week

Sophie Richards

Given the fact that I couldn’t give her match of the week, she damn sure deserves winner of the week! Sophie, since becoming the Television Champion, has been on a path to greatness with the frequency of her title defenses. She is simply the best Television Champion in that title’s history, bar none. And whoever finally takes that title off of her has some heavy shoes to fill! Sophie is going to be competing for the FFW Championship before 2012 is over, I am confident. And when she does, I’ll be betting on her!

Isn’t Sophie, the only Television Champion to actually successfully defend the title?

-       Tara Thunder (the other retainee this week, doing so by avenging her loss to Hanna Elliot.  Tara’s really come around these past few weeks.  Now the trick is to keep this momentum going)

-       Melanie Avilo (Beating Cara Stone is no small accomplishment, and Melanie did that with flying colors in the Future Shock final to become the new #1 Contender to the Evolution Championship.  Well done, from someone I thought was going out the very first week)

Loser of the Week

Johnny Moxie

I know he’s not in FFW, but the fact that he has diminished the SVW Championship to the degree he has saddens me. I have fond memories of calling some epic SVW Championship matches between some of the best competitors in the business. And Moxie does the title no favors in title defenses or even just one on one matches as we saw at New Year’s Retribution. He has brought the honor and prestige of that belt to an all time low with the way he conducts himself, and frankly I look forward to Criminal Intent when either Nathan McFarlane or Rexxx relieves him of it!

Its okay.  The loserdom of Johnny Moxie is strong enough to transcend all feds. 

-       Hanna Elliot (Rumor has it the next episode of her webcast, Hanna consults a dictionary to learn the definition of the phrase ‘sustaining momentum’)

-       Sophia Black (Getting yourself disqualified?  Smart move.  Punching one of the most vindictive, powerful women on the planet in the face? Not so much)

Douchebag of the Week

Anthony Gambini

I knew without a shadow of a doubt that there was going to be something up when Gambini booked himself on my show to face Nathan. I had a feeling there was going to be some kind of shenanigans, but I did make the mistake of thinking he might actually fight. How wrong I was! Instead he just surrounded himself by more henchmen, and this time it just happened to be Jackson. I know Mr. Jackson wants people to talk about him, and that’s what matters to him. Frankly, I have never looked to promote lackeys and henchmen, and he would not have done what he did were it not for SVW’s CEO! Criminal Intent, roll on! Because as much as I have faith in Spencer to pick the best damn team possible, rest assured that I will do everything in my power to ensure that February 12 is the last night SVW is cursed with Anthony Gambini! And as well connected as he thinks he is, New Year’s Retribution proved one thing. I’ve got connections too. You can call me AT&T, and after all the shit he’s caused me personally, Gambini will find out how well connected I am at Criminal Intent. Promise.

2011 was a bad year for the Anthony Gambini fan club.  With Osama, Mummar, and Kim all kicking the bucket, membership is at an all time low.  Anyone have Manuel and Hugo on speedial?

-       Crystal Hilton (Wow, I haven’t seen a self-absorbed violent binge like that since the Rori Snyder days)

-       Whitley Mercer (Happy Whitley?  You finally got in the awards section, something you weren’t relevant enough to accomplish the first time around)

A big special thanks to Mark for the awards!  And, of course, you can pretty much catch Mr. Horton on every show either FFW or SVW runs. That is one busy busy dude.

MEME OF THE WEEK!

I hope you guys are enjoying them, because these are seriously fun as hell to do.  This week, well, a bit of a look into the future, given the prophetic significance of our now current year.

Fuckin’ Mayans.

Anyways, that will do it for this edition of the Power X.  But Hark!  It won’t be two weeks until the next one goes up, because in just a matter of DAYS, you’ll be getting the first EVER FFW Power X-Travaganza!  Seriously, this is going to be one end of year revue you do NOT want to miss!

Until then… POLLA OUT!!!

Daniel Pollaski is an freelance wrestling columnist, SVW wrestler, and the manager of Wendy Briese.  If you haven’t figured out by now that he will also be the reason Whitley Mercer will soon be crying herself to sleep at night, sucking her thumb, then you obviously haven’t been paying attention.